


A Little Passive Aggressive Revenge

by Jewels59



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Gen, M/M, Revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:26:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26879677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jewels59/pseuds/Jewels59
Summary: Bucky doesn't attack a problem with violence anymore.  Now it's more subtle.  Coming in from a different angle.  But the effect of fear is still the same.  This is a story of how Bucky gets Tony to sway to his desires without raising a hand.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 16
Kudos: 44





	A Little Passive Aggressive Revenge

A Little Passive Aggressive Revenge 

Bucky was pretty much fed up past his eyeballs. Logically he knew that Stark had all the money, but that didn’t mean he got to call all the shots. 

If you wanted to get right down to it, Bucky was a wealthy man himself. 70 years of back pay from the military alone saw to that. Then you add in the lawsuit that was filed on his behalf after the Winter Soldier Trials. 

Yeah, he wasn’t as wealthy as Tony but he was doing more than okay. 

It didn’t stop Tony from acting like BMOC though. Bucky was about to put a stop to it, or at least take a stand. 

Steve came home to find Bucky just standing in the middle of their living room. Hands on his hips and a look of hard concentration on his face. Steve knew that look. That look that said somebody had pissed him off and was about to get their ass handed to them. Steve just hoped it wasn’t him. 

“Bucky?” Steve whispered, “You okay Baby?” 

Bucky turned his head and those hard, glinting eyes bore down on Steve. Almost enough to make him flinch. “Stark is an asshole,” he bit out. 

“Well, yeah, we all know that,” Steve replied. “What did he do this time?” 

“Have you noticed,” Bucky started, “That we’re always forced to listen to whatever music, and I use the term loosely, Stark wants? We head out to or come back from a mission and he blasts that crap.” 

“I guess I’ve gotten used to it. I don’t even hear it anymore. I tune it out.” 

Bucky flung his arms out in a gesture of frustration. “Now he’s started playing it in the gym!” he all but yelled. “It’s getting on my last nerve Stevie! I can’t take it anymore!” 

Taking the final step forward, Steve gently rubbed his hands up and down Bucky’s arms. Hoping to placate him without dismissing him. “Bucky what are you planning? Don’t do anything stupid, okay?” 

Bucky’s eyes, full of aggravation and irritation, snapped up at the same time Steve felt a smack upside his head. “I’m not an idiot Steve,” he said. “But I AM gonna make him pay.” 

Steve gave him a fearful look. Generally when Bucky said those words, they were much gruffer and always meant violence. But this time they were said with smugness. A tone that said Bucky had a plan and wouldn’t be deterred. 

It made Steve shudder. 

Two days passed and nothing else had been said. However, Steve was very aware that Bucky had been preoccupied. That always meant that Bucky was planning, plotting. The thought alone made Steve shudder again. Clear down to his toes. 

He was sure it wouldn’t be violent. Well, reasonably sure. Bucky had said so. Right? 

Steve also noticed the inordinate amount of time Bucky spent looking through his phone with his earbuds in. Every once in a while, he would wince or his eyes would narrow. When this would happen, he’d go in search of his notebook and write something down. 

This in and of itself wasn’t anything new. Bucky was always writing something down so he’d remember it. It was the almost feral smile that accompanied it that gave Steve an overwhelming sense of unease. 

“Uh, Bucky, what are you doing?” Steve questioned tentatively. 

Bucky jerked his head around and grinned at Steve, showing way too many teeth. “Nothin’,” came the sing song reply. 

Steve cocked his head and crossed his arms over his chest. “How come I don’t believe you?” 

Bucky let out a sigh. Stepping forward he gently cupped Steve’s face. “Nothing dangerous Stevie. I promise. Just trust me okay?” 

Steve took a moment to consider Bucky’s words, then nodded once. It didn’t make the pit in his stomach lessen any though. 

The next day Steve found Bucky pounding furiously on his laptop. Steve feared for the sustainability of such a delicate piece of technology. Occasionally Bucky would stop, cock his head and narrow his eyes. Then his face would change. Steve could almost see the lightbulb go on over Bucky’s head. With renewed vigor Bucky would return to pounding on the keyboard. 

Steve retreated to the kitchen to start dinner. One thing he knew for certain was if Bucky was this focused, he hadn’t eaten worth a damn all day. With his head stuck in the frig he heard, “Hey Jarvis?” 

“Yes, Sergeant?” 

“Don’t call me that. I told you ‘Bucky’ is fine.” 

“Yes, Sergeant.” 

Steve smiled at what he knew was a look of irritation on Bucky’s face. Even though he couldn’t see it. 

“Ya know what? I think I’d rather do it myself,” Bucky said dismissingly. 

“As you wish, Sergeant.” 

Steve could hear Bucky’s teeth creak with how hard he was gritting them. Steve snickered to himself. The arguments with Jarvis never failed to amuse him. 

Dinner was in the final stages when Steve heard Bucky shout. 

“WooHoo! Got it! You’re goin’ down you son of a bitch!” 

Steve should be afraid, very afraid, of that reaction. Instead he was simply pleased that Bucky was this happy. 

Bucky wandered into the kitchen after shutting down his laptop. He came up behind Steve and wrapped his arms around his waist. “Mmm smells good in here,” he mumbled into Steve’s back. Steve turned enough to kiss Bucky on the temple. 

“Finished with what you’re doing?” Steve asked. 

“Almost. But the rest can wait. I’m starved.” 

See? Steve knew him so well. 

***** 

The next day Steve and Bucky were sparring in the gym. It was blissfully quiet except for the sounds of pounding feet, bodies hitting the floor, the occasional grunt when a well placed punch connected. Steve loved this. The ability to go all out. Bucky was definitely a match for him. 

The doors swooshed open and the loud, crass music started to play as Tony, Natasha and Clint walked in. Tony had that stupid beaming smile of arrogance on his face. Natasha rolled her eyes. Clint meanwhile seemed unaffected either way. 

Bucky came to a dead stop. His arms dropped to his sides as his hands balled up in fists. His face contorted into a grimace and his left eye honest-to-God twitched. Steve couldn’t help the look of concern that crossed his own face. 

Bucky let out a deep sigh and stepped away from Steve. He watched as Bucky walked to the wall and tilted his head towards it, bracing himself on his left forearm. His shoulders dropped with...what? Defeat? Resignation? No, it was more like... Steve didn’t know what. 

Everyone else seemed oblivious to the tableau unfolding in front of them. But not Steve. Steve was observing intently. He knew the penny was about to drop. 

Steve watched as Bucky reached down and retrieved his phone from his bag. Tapping the screen twice, the music, (if you could call it that) stopped. 

“What the fuck?” Tony yelled. “Jarvis!” 

Bucky tapped the screen one more time. 

Hiya Barbie came a male voice. 

Hi Ken was the almost too cheerful female reply. 

Steve forcefully bit his lip to stop the burst of laughter threatening to break free. Looking to the trio he took in Tony’s appalled expression, the quirk of Natasha’s lips, and the absolute glee on Clint’s face. 

The laughter couldn’t be contained any longer as the words of the song started to sink in. Steve let it go, long and loud. 

Bucky dropped his phone into his bag and grabbed the handles. He turned and walked towards the door with a swagger in his step. 

“Jarvis! Turn it off! Now!” Tony screamed. 

“I’m sorry Sir but my protocols seem to have been overridden.” 

“What? Buckster get back here!” were the last words Bucky heard before the doors swooshed closed behind him. 

Steve barreled through the door to their apartment. “Bucky! Buck! Where are you?” he shouted. 

Bucky sauntered down the hall in response to Steve’s rather boisterous inquiry. His face still held a smug smile but now added a questioning lift of his eyebrow. “You bellowed?” 

“That was fantastic. Fan-fucking-tastic.” Steve bent at the waist and slapped his hands to his knees at the hilarity. “Too bad you didn’t stick around to see Stark’s meltdown.” 

“I figured discretion was the better part of valor,” he said lifting his shoulder in a shrug. 

“It doesn’t matter,” Steve got out between giggles. “I’d bet my last dollar Jarvis has it on video.” 

Right on cue their TV came to life with a spitting, sputtering, cussing Tony Stark on the screen. Throwing his arms up in frustration Tony yelled, “What do you mean ‘protocols overridden’? How?” 

“I’m afraid I haven’t been able to determine that Sir.” 

“Oh My God! Shut it off! I’m going to have that stupid fucking song stuck in my head all day,” he yelled at the ceiling. 

“Once the song is complete, your regularly scheduled music will return.” 

The screen went dark. 

Bucky turned to Steve, grin firmly in place. The sight of tears of laughter streaming down Steve’s face was his undoing. He dissolved into his own fit of giggles right along beside Steve. 

Lying in bed wrapped in Bucky’s arms, Steve whispered in the dark. “Can I be your Barbie Girl?” 

***** 

The next two days were unusually quiet. It was almost unnerving. But Steve knew this was far from over. He knew Bucky wouldn’t be one and done. He was lying in wait for the next opportunity. 

When the alarm sounded to assemble it came as a relief to Steve. Now, don’t get him wrong. He never wanted it due to the destruction that came with it. Anytime a situation required the Avengers, it was never a good thing. However, right now? Right now he needed something to help relieve the itching under his skin. 

Bucky strode down the hall towards the living room buckling up the last of his tac gear. Sniper rifle slung over his shoulder. Besides his plethora of knives, this was the one thing never taken to the armory. It was his baby and he treated it as such. 

Bucky always reasoned that if Steve kept his shield in the apartment, he could keep his rifle. 

“Ready Buck?” Steve questioned. He only received a low hum in reply. 

They joined the team gathered on the helipad waiting for the quinjet. Last minute adjustments to gear as they waited. 

“So...” Clint started. 

“So?” Bucky asked. 

“Um, you gonna...” 

“Wait and see,” Bucky said. 

They started to board the quinjet by way of the lowered back hatch. Tony’s music blaring in defiance. Steve watched as Bucky’s face contorted into that grimace again. Only this time he took a deep breath and that look was replaced by one of serenity. 

But nothing happened. 

Throughout the flight everyone aboard kept eyeing Bucky warily. Furtive glances from the corner of their eyes. They all knew something was about to happen. The feeling of guarded anticipation was palpable in the air. 

“Two minutes to drop,” Clint said from the pilot’s seat. 

Steve took a deep breath and waited. Here we go, he thought. 

Once again, Tony’s ‘motivational music’ started to play through the coms. Bucky tapped his pant leg twice, and the music cut off. Tapping once more an obnoxious shout sounded loudly in everyone’s ear. It was hilarious to watch each of them jump in turn. 

Who let the dogs out? Who, who, who, who, who. Who let the dogs out? 

Steve threw his head back and laughed. How apropos! 

Tony flipped up his faceplate, staring at Bucky with his mouth hanging open. “No. Just no,” he mumbled. 

Bucky strutted to the lowered deck, turned around, leaned and started to fall backwards silently into space. Flipping Tony off all the way to the ground. 

He could hear the hoots and hollers from his teammates in his coms as the song continued to play. 

***** 

The mission had been hard, but successful. They had returned to the Tower with nothing more that scrapes and bruises. Nothing requiring an overnight stay in the infirmary. Not much collateral damage either. To Steve that was a success. Though he knew that they all would be sleeping for the next twelve hours. 

When Steve woke up the next morning Bucky was gone. He knew where he’d find him though. Steve didn’t even bother getting dressed. Rubbing his eyes, he stepped into the elevator mumbling around a yawn, “Communal room please Jarvis.” 

Stepping out, Steve took in the bleary weariness of his team. Sure enough there was Bucky in the kitchen. A sense of fondness rolled over him at the sight. Bucky had become quite the cook and it seemed the duty fell to him to keep the team fed and nourished. And he took the duty seriously. 

Bucky plated up the food and set it on the table. The team as a whole rose and made their way towards the food. Sounds of sleepy contentment filled the air. Steve just smiled with affection for each and every one of them. But the most was saved for the man coming to stand in front of him. 

“Mornin’ Buck,” he said as he reached out to rub a hand down his arm. 

“Mornin’ Stevie,” Bucky replied with a quick kiss. He recoiled with a scrunch of his nose. “Ew. Didn’t you stop to brush your teeth?” 

Steve snickered. “Love you too.” 

Before the conversation could be taken any farther the elevator dinged with a new arrival. They both turned to see Tony step into the room. He didn’t look like he had slept at all. “I smell food,” Tony muttered under his breath. Raising his head, he locked eyes with Bucky. “Uh...” 

The team turned their gazes as one in anticipation. Watching, waiting. With baited breath, as it were. Steve could feel the giddy expectation rising beneath his own skin. 

Steve let his hands fall away. Glancing at Bucky, he whispered, “Now?” 

“Now.” 

Steve reached down and poked at Bucky’s pocket where he knew his phone resided. Tapping once on what he assumed was the screen, he waited. Steve was rewarded as a kitchy little tune began to play. 

I told the witch doctor I was in love with you. 

Bucky smiled a serene little smile at Steve. “Be right back Baby,” he said as he stepped away. He stopped front of Tony, reaching down to take his hand. Tony eyed him with trepidation. Bucky swung into action, starting the fast paced steps of a jitterbug. Tony had no choice but to follow along. Bucky was holding him that tightly. The amazing part was that Tony followed along almost flawlessly. 

The team watched with the same awe that one would watch a train wreck. Unable to look away. Then the snickers started, turning into outright guffaws as Bucky continued to twirl Tony around the floor. 

Steve had to admit a certain amount of jealousy. He wanted to be the one dancing with Bucky. But try as he might, he never got the hang of it. 

Tony finally gathered himself enough to jerk away from Bucky, slapping his hands in the process. He stormed to the elevator doors, Bucky’s voice following him. 

“Wait! Come back! I love you!” Bucky cried plaintively. Arms stretched out in a begging gesture. 

Tony flipped him off as the doors slid shut. 

Loud cheers and applause erupted from the table. Bucky turned and took a bow. Steve didn’t think he’d ever been prouder in his life. 

***** 

Thor had deigned to bless Midguard with his presence. That always meant that not only the core team but everyone that could get away showed up for the shenanigans they knew would accompany the visit. The communal room was packed full. 

“Hey, God of Thunder, you ready for some fun?” Bucky inquired. Almost too politely. 

Tony’s head snapped up at the simple question. He narrowed his eyes and stared at Bucky. HARD. 

Steve stepped away from the crowd and leaned against the wall, taking it all in. By this point he knew that whatever Bucky had planned it was going to irritate the crap out of Tony. He was totally onboard for that. 

The big screen TV that they used to watch movies came to life. Steve saw Tony’s shoulders relax a little. He most likely thought that the worst that was going to happen was a stupid movie. Should know better than that Tony, Steve thought. Once Bucky sinks his teeth into something, he’s like a dog with a bone. There’s no letting go. 

Bucky grabbed his phone from the table and Steve watched as Tony visibly cringed. It was great. 

The TV screen was filled with a colorful image of men dressed in all manner of costume. It immediately grabbed the attention of Steve’s artistic side. Bright colors always did that to him. But it was Clint jumping up from his chair that startled him out of his contemplation. 

“Yes!” he yelled as he fist pumped the air. 

Thor turned to him with question in his eyes. “What...” he managed to get out before Clint jerked him up with him. Clint started what looked like choreographed steps, singing with the song. Then came the interactive part that Steve didn’t know was coming. 

It’s fun to stay at the YMCA 

Clint was making motions over his head. It only took a moment for Steve to realize it was a mimic of the letters. 

“Teach me this wonder!” Thor yelled. His body bounced in time with the beat of the music. Thor watched the repetition of the simple steps. Moving side to side, front to back. Clint showed him again. And again. Until he got the hang of it. It was hilarious watching this giant of a being raising his arms above his head, stuttering the motions. Steve’s grin grew even bigger. 

Soon everyone in the room was moving in unison, copying Clint. Forward and back. Side to side. Clapping their hands on every fourth beat. This was better than any aerobic exercise. 

Steve looked around the room at the mild chaos. Thor’s face was beaming when the song came to an end. “I wish to do this again!” he bellowed. 

Bucky queued the song again. The opening strains blasting in the air. Steve caught a glance of Tony out of the corner of his eye. He sat at the bar with his forehead resting in his hand. Barely above a whisper Steve heard, “No, no, no, no, no.” 

***** 

Thursday afternoon rolled around with nothing on the agenda. It could be a lazy day if everyone chose it to be. But that’s not how this crew worked. It was balls to the wall whenever they’d had enough caffeine to be awake. Today wasn’t going to be any different. 

Bucky and Steve were sitting on the couch in the communal living room. Steve’s heart swelled at the sound of Bucky quietly giggling over the Sunday comics. 

“Oh Garfield, you’re my spirit animal,” Bucky mumbled. 

Steve couldn’t have contained his snicker even if he’d wanted to. That statement, said without thought, was way too accurate. 

Clint was in the kitchen making another sandwich. How many was that now? Steve could hear him quietly singing to himself. Super Soldier hearing and all that. The words ‘YMCA’ reached his ears. Followed immediately by a muffled HeHeHe. 

The amount of joy in the festivities of that evening still marveled Steve. It had left him with a sense of delight that reverberated clear through his bones. 

“HeHeHe,” Clint snickered again. 

Natasha flopped down on the couch between Steve and Bucky. ”Hey Soldier,” she purred at Bucky. “What do you have planned for the day?” 

“What makes you think I have anything planned?” he asked nonchalantly. 

The unladylike snort that escaped from Natasha caught Steve by surprise. It was something he’d never heard before and judging by her reaction he doubted he ever would again. 

Three things happened in quick succession. Natasha squirmed (never happened), shot a glare at Steve (always happened), and lifted her head haughtily. 

Steve cleared his throat and averted his gaze. Suddenly the book in his hand required his full and undivided attention. That didn’t stop him from eavesdropping on the rest of the conversation though. 

“Who else is joining us today?” Bucky asked without seeming to have a care in the world. 

“Pepper’s on her way. Maybe Bruce. Why do you ask Darling?” 

“Oh, no reason in particular. Curiosity,” he lied. 

“Tony won’t be here. No reason to be planning revenge,” she said, tilting her head down and giving him a look through her eyebrows. It reminded Steve of the look his mother used to give him when he was in trouble. Just the thought of it still made Steve shiver. 

“There’s no planning left,” he replied, unfazed by her look. With a shrug of his shoulder he continued, “Only implementation.” Bucky stood from the couch and extended a hand to Natasha, pulling her to her feet. “C’mon Blondie,” he said to Steve, “You too.” 

It amazed Steve how quickly he fell into Bucky’s plans. Since the day they’d met. Over the years, things changed. Yet still they remained the same. 

Clint came out of the kitchen in time to see Bucky take his phone out of his pocket. “Yes!” he shouted around the sandwich in his mouth. Natasha turned a swift glare in his direction and he swallowed just as swiftly. 

Clint could be such a big kid, Steve smiled fondly. 

The sharp BOOM BOOM BOOM of the drumbeat filled the air. 

Natasha’s eyes shot wide open as her body began to bounce in time with the music. Clint shouted a gleeful “AhaAhaAha.” About that time Pepper bounded into the room. “Wait for me,” she yelled as she tossed her shoes into a corner. 

There they all stood in a circle in the middle of the room. Coffee table hastily pushed to the side. 

Hey Mickey You’re So Fine. You’re so fine you blow my mind. 

The jumping from every participant began in earnest. Steve observed for a moment. The moves weren’t unlike the motion of skiing. I can do this, he thought. 

Bucky reached out a hand to Steve. His breath caught at the look of pure joy on Bucky’s face. “C’mon Stevie. You can do this,” he encouraged, echoing Steve’s own thoughts. Steve tipped his head back in a booming laugh. Grabbing the proffered hand, he joined the fray. 

Steve let his body move, never taking his eyes off Bucky. He finally understood the sense of freedom that came with just letting go. 

Bucky turned to him and started a filthy roll of his hips in time with the beat. He put his hands on Steve’s hips and guided him into the same motion. Steve’s breathing became labored and his steps faltered. 

“Don’t think. Just feel,” Bucky said straight into Steve’s ear. THAT’S the problem, he thought, I’m feeling way too much. 

Bucky smiled and began to jump again. The hands on Steve’s hips left him little choice but to move with him. Steve felt the laugh billowing up in his chest again. 

He watched as Natasha and Pepper leaned back to back, shoulder to shoulder, belting out the words to the song. Bodies shimmying down with bent knees and back up again. But it was the next course of action that took him completely by surprise. 

Hey Bucky you’re so fine. You’re so fine you blow my mind. 

Bucky came to a dead stop, staring at the women. Eyes wide with astonishment. Then he burst into laughter like a geyser. Sudden and without warning. 

Steve looked on with awe. He hadn’t heard that laugh in many years. 

The song ended and everyone was breathing hard from the exertion. Except Steve of course. All heads turned to the shouted “HA” at the entrance of the room. Tony stood there with his phone in his outstretched hand. “I got it all on video. It’ll be getting released on any media sight I can find,” he said smugly. 

“I sure hope so. Let’s see how many hits we get. And how fast. Any bets?” Bucky asked the room at large. “Oh, and send me a copy too.” 

“Why? Why do you do this?” Tony asked with his palms tipped up, eyes searching the ceiling for answers. “Why?” he asked again. 

Steve lifted one shoulder in reply. “I don’t know Tony. I’ve never been able to explain him either.” 

***** 

Bucky slammed the front door shut hard enough to rattle the pictures on the wall. Steve stepped down the hallway to see Bucky breathing heavily. Fists balled at his sides. “Uh Buck? You ok?” Steve asked warily. 

“God he’s such a dick!” 

“We’ve already established that.” Steve cringed as those hard and calculating eyes focused solely on him. “Why do you keep going around him if he upsets you this bad?” 

“Because I have to! Not like just anybody can tune up my arm when it starts glitching.” 

“Ah, I see,” Steve replied in what he hoped was a soothing tone. 

“That’s it. Time to pull out the big guns. He’s gonna capitulate if it’s the last thing I do.” 

Through the course of gentle questioning Steve was able to ascertain that Bucky had gone to Tony’s lab for an adjustment. But while there Tony had taken the opportunity to harass Bucky. He was at Tony’s mercy and Tony took full advantage of that. The choice of music had been particularly obnoxious evidently. 

“What did you expect Bucky? Tony isn’t just going to roll over and play dead.” 

“Oh but he will. But not today. Timing has to be right.” 

Steve gave him a worried look. What had he planned now? But Steve knew deep in his soul that whatever it was he wouldn’t be able to stop him. Even if he wanted to at this point. 

“Jarvis?” Bucky inquired. 

“Yes S-S-S Bucky,” came the stuttered response. 

Bucky’s lip twitched in a satisfied quirk. Steve smiled. It looks like Bucky is winning more than one battle in this little war of his. 

“Where’s Tony?” 

“Sir is currently located in his lab S-S-S Bucky.” Then there was an audible sigh of irritation from the ceiling. Bucky had the smile of a satisfied man. 

“How much sleep has he had?” 

“Sir last slept 19 hours and 43 minutes ago.” 

“Perfect. Hey Steve? You busy?” 

“Nothing that can’t wait. The show about to start?” Steve asked, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. He was probably more excited than he should be. 

“Yep,” he said, popping the ‘P’ like a teenage girl. “Take a seat.” 

Bucky opened his laptop and set it across his legs. With a few well-placed keystrokes a program popped into existence on the screen. 

“Jarvis run program.” 

Their TV screen came to life, showing Tony in his lab. He was deeply engrossed in whatever project he was currently working on. 

Tony’s music, which was grating to be sure, slowly faded out. In its place whatever Bucky planned just as slowly faded in. Steve didn’t recognize the song but that wasn’t surprising. The words weren’t sung so much as they were slurred. But Steve figured he didn’t have to know exactly what was being said. That wasn’t the point. 

The music continued to grow in volume. The tune was almost soothing, tame in comparison to the other songs Bucky had picked. Tony’s foot started tapping in time with the beat. It was obvious Tony was totally unaware that he was moving at all. Steve watched as Tony’s head started to bob as well. 

Then the non-sensical words reached Steve’s ears. 

MmmBop dap a do wop. Dupa do wop. 

Fascination crossed Steve’s face as Tony started to sing quietly, gaining traction as the song continued to play. He hazarded a glance at Bucky. But he was glued to the screen watching the scene unfold. 

After the second chorus Tony’s head snapped up so fast Steve feared a case of whiplash. Tony reared back his arm holding his screwdriver and threw it forward full force. Hard enough that the screwdriver embedded itself in the wall. 

Tony covered his face with both hands, shaking his head. Those hands rubbed back through his hair, gripping tightly. A loud and anguished, “AAAAHHHH!” escaped his mouth. Heaving a deep sigh, he turned to glare at the camera situated in a corner of the ceiling. 

Bucky jumped from the couch. Arms held high above his head he did a victory dance. “Yes! Yes! Yes!” he shouted. 

Steve gave a small smile, knowing this was most likely the final volley in this war of theirs. It left him feeling both parts relieved and sad. 

They watched as Tony stood from his chair, the wheels making a grating noise as he pushed it back harshly. “Jarvis! Where’s Bucky?” he shouted. 

***** 

The pounding on their apartment door surprised exactly no one. 

Bucky ambled towards it as though absolutely nothing was remiss. Turning the knob he opened the door with complete calm. 

“Tony. What a surprise.” 

“Don’t! Just don’t!” he yelled, forcing his way inside. “What the hell was that? Totally unfair to take advantage of my present state of mind.” 

Bucky lifted a shoulder. “All’s fair in love and war Tony. You know that.” 

“How long are you going to do this?” Tony asked forlornly. 

Bucky leaned a little farther into Tony’s space. Almost nose to nose. Very quietly and with the full force of the Winter Soldier, Bucky replied, “As long as it takes.” 

“To what end?” Tony shouted. “Why are you doing this?” 

Leaning back, Bucky returned himself to his full height. Towering over Tony. That alone was intimidating as hell. “Your music sucks Tony. And I’m done with it.” 

The look on Tony’s face showed a dawning realization. As though it had never occurred to him that anyone wouldn’t like his choices. “Uh...” 

“I can do this all day Tony.” Behind him, Bucky heard Steve let out an undignified snort. “Tit for tat. I’m a stubborn asshole. You know that. And shameless to boot.” 

Tony’s shoulders slumped in defeat. That rarely happened. Steve knew this was a big moment. One that should be savored. 

“Okay,” Tony huffed. “What conditions come with this detente? You gotta give me something too. I’m not going to just surrender.” 

“I know that Tony. That wouldn’t be fair on anyone’s part. So how about this?” Bucky took a deep breath and forged ahead. “Let’s swap out. No one person has complete control. I promise that I won’t complain about your music, but in turn you can’t complain about mine.” 

Steve realized in that moment just how much Bucky had been thinking about this. He knew what his endgame was and how to achieve it. Now it was all coming to fruition. The world called Steve the greatest tactical mind of the 21st century, but he thought that maybe he had a rival. 

Tony stuck out his hand towards Bucky. “Deal,” he said firmly. “But I’d really like a couple of days reprieve. Can you back off for a day or two?” 

The feral grin that showed too many teeth made its appearance yet again. Bucky shook the extended hand. “One more Tony. Then I’ll stop.” 

From his vantage point at the side of this two person show, Steve watched Tony pale. He knew this one would be spectacularly irritating. 

Bucky retrieved his phone from the coffee table, lightly tapping the screen. The soft whistling along with a Jamaican beat filled the air. 

Don’t worry be happy. 

Bucky reached out and gently patted Tony’s cheek. Turning on his heel, he made a strategic retreat to the kitchen. 

“How can you love such an asshole?” Tony asked Steve. 

“He’s a constant source of entertainment, for sure.” 

***** 

Epilogue 

“Are we done here?” Clint asked. “I want pizza.” 

The last bit of the Hydra base had been cleared. This one wasn’t particularly well fortified but had presented a challenge none the less. Now there was only one thing left to do. This was the part Bucky liked best. Blow it to hell. 

“Cap isn’t clear yet,” Natasha said. “We’re not done until he is.” 

“Hey Cap,” Clint said through the coms, “Hurry up. I’m hungry.” 

“When aren’t you?” Steve questioned. “One more minute.” 

“Um Tony?” Bucky asked. “Can I have one more?” 

Tony considered him for a moment, knowing full well what he was asking. But appreciating that he asked none the less. What was going on in that mind of his, he thought. “Why?” he asked quietly. 

“This one is gonna be great. I promise. Please?” Bucky wasn’t above a little pleading if it got him what he wanted. 

A deep sigh met his ears as Tony capitulated with a wave of his hand. The entire team gathered on the deck, waiting for what would happen next. They watched as Steve exited the building about 500 feet away. 

Steve didn’t so much walk as he marched. When he had on the suit his whole persona changed. He was in command and it showed. It turned Bucky on every damn time. 

The beat of the music came through the coms. Steve never broke stride. When he was in that headspace it took a lot to faze him. He continued his trek towards the quinjet, authority in every step. 

I knew a guy who’s tough but sweet. He’s so fine he can’t be beat. 

Tony let out a snorted laugh that temporarily captured Bucky’s attention. But it was short lived. His focus quickly returning to the sight before him. 

About that time the building exploded. Almost in perfect sync with the music. But what was really impressive was that Steve didn’t even falter. His steps even and steady. Bucky’s breath caught at the sight of Steve framed in all that orange fury. It set Steve’s blonde hair with an ethereal glow. 

I want candy. I want candy. 

Bucky’s mouth watered at the thought. His musings totally at odds with the time and place he was in. 

Steve had reached a point where he was now about 200 feet from them. Bucky sauntered down the deck, making his way to the field. He let his body move to the beat of the music. 

Even from where he was, he could see Steve’s eyes start to darken. He must be doing something right. Bucky couldn’t have hoped for a better reaction. 

As they met in the middle ground, Steve came to a stop. Bucky continued to dance. In front of Steve. Around Steve. Making a show of it. The intricate steps alluring in their own way. 

This is a first, Bucky thought as he watched Steve break character. He was no longer Captain. Stoic and in charge. He was Bucky’s Steve. The one that Bucky could get to do his bidding. Every damn time. 

The song came to an end, sadly enough. Steve reached out to grasp Bucky by the back of the neck. Pulling him in, he kissed Bucky oh so sweetly. 

“Damn Bucky,” Steve breathed into his mouth. 

Their moment was interrupted by the sounds of the entire crew whooping and hollering and laughing. 

“You were right Bucky boy,” Tony said through his laughter. “That one was completely and utterly worth it.” 

Bucky reached for his ear and turned off his com. “Let’s go home Stevie,” he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> This little missive is inspired by those songs that are our guilty pleasures. The ones society tells us we should hate but secretly sing (loudly) in the car or dance to in the privacy of our homes. It all started when one of them came over the intercom at work. It was amazing to see how many people sang along to it. Then looked up shameful when caught. My brain took over with the stor.
> 
> So I apologize (not really) if these songs are now stuck in your head. Just know that my own playlist has expanded to include many more of these earworms. I'm not immune either lol.


End file.
